Eat, Sleep, Run, Repeat: The Introduction

Mid – August, 2007:

I arrived home from work, drunk off of CAMO XXX malt liquor.  It had been my routine that year to pick up a couple of shitty beers on the way home from work to blow off some steam.  At the time, with my then-fiancé Lynea having left Oregon early to set up our new life on the east coast, my friend Brian was living with me.  Later that fall I was planning on returning back east with Brian to join Lynea, therefore completing  my exodus from Oregon, to start a family on the east coast, my home growing up as a kid.

Later that night, while nursing another beer in bed, Brian returned to our house from working all day.  He came in to my bedroom, saw what was going on, and insisted that I get the hell up and put on my running shoes.  I fought it at first, but Brian ended up winning.  Reluctantly, while nursing a strong buzz, I put on some running clothes and joined Brian outside to appease him.

We started to run, I had no pain in my legs because I couldn’t feel anything, just my buzz.  I don’t remember speaking much with Brian while running.  I felt guilty and shameful knowing that the last two years of drinking and drugs were catching up to me.  I felt heavy, slow, and fat.  I hadn’t worked out much since I started my then-current job in 2006 selling real estate.

At around a mile and a half of running we turned around to head back home.  For some reason, maybe due to my buzz, I started to feel good. Brian and I picked up the pace.  As we got closer back home we kept driving the pace.  With around 400 meters to go before we arrived home I started to sprint and passed Brian.  Although I was drunk the last few minutes of that run began to reveal a revived sense of freedom to me.  Maybe I could run?  A couple of minutes later after Brian and I caught our breath he said that I had just put down a 23:00 5k. “No shit,” I thought.  He continued by saying that I could run and that he was impressed with what I had just done considering the past two years I had been completely sedentary.  At the time I didn’t hear or believe him.  I wasn’t ready to hear him.  At one time in my life I had been a fairly fit endurance athlete. But now my hopes and dreams of re-attaining that fitness had left my conciousness.  After hitting the shower that night to wash off I returned to bed and cracked open another beer and passed out.

Fast forward to today, 9 years later.  Just last month I completed my first 100 mile race.   I run races in length that are inconceivable to most people. Running has become a cornerstone in my life, so much so that it is my method of meditation and mindfulness.  I spend countless hours and miles running and exploring the wilderness of Oregon and beyond.  Without running I don’t know where I’d be in terms of recovery from alcoholism and addiction.  Today, with running in my life, I feel more at peace.

As I reflect on that hot August night when Brian drug my drunk ass out of bed to go run with him I am humbled by how far I’ve come since that run.  Looking back, that was the first time that summer that Brian saved my life.  We’ll get to the second time later on.

So, how did I get here?  Well, let me tell you….


“I like fat Spence:” Exploring my issues with body image

A Comeback from Addiction, My Story

I’m willing to bet that with some of my friends I am officially handing in my “man-card” in writing this post. Then again maybe I handed that distinguished membership in when I started shaving my legs in 2003.  Here goes nothing…

At the risk of attracting criticism and bewilderment of my male friends I feel like I need to explore the issue that athletic men, or just men in general, have with the issue of body image, from my own perspective.  If I’m honest with myself this topic  can help to explain the root  of many of my addictive behaviors over the years, from drinking to training, and many things in between.

The following is a loose transcript of a conversation that I had with a gal that I was in a relationship with back in 2006/07.  I remember the scene well, we were having cocktails and appetizers at the old Staccato restaurant…

View original post 933 more words


Novo Veritas: Who Are We?

Updated with our video describing in more detail who we are. Check it out!

A Comeback from Addiction, My Story

Please check out our youtube page featuring a video clip about who we are:

Novo Veritas:  What is it?  In Latin Novo Veritas translates to honest change.  Betsy Hartley and I have each gone through our own separate struggles, she with obesity and diabetes, me with alcoholism and addiction.  Paired together we offer a message of hope to anyone who struggles with their own personal demons and is looking to make a change.  There are several ways to change, and Betsy and I are by no means experts on the subject.  However, in our own separate ways, we have been able to confront our own demons in an honest and forthright way to work the process of recovery.  It just so happens that we are friends, and the combination of our stories creates a cohesive message that with a little work, and a little honesty and self-reflection, change is possible.

View original post 155 more words